You have a friend named Efren. He was Mommy's friend first, but now I think he likes you more than me. Sometimes when we are talking I can totally tell he isn't really listening and then will admit, "sorry, can't focus; staring at baby."

He gave you lots of gifts before you were born, but my personal favorite was this enormous orange and gray striped t-shirt. It hangs in your closet patiently waiting for you to turn five and finally fill it out.
I didn't know what the 5T meant was Efren's defense to the somewhat odd baby shower gift that unapologetically took its place amongst tiny onsies, knit booties, and little pants with waist circumferences that seemed impossible.

One time when I was dropping Efren off after a Bachorlette viewing party (us grads like to get together to watch bad reality TV.....I think it helps us deal with our superior intellect), you were, huge surprise here, screaming your head off in your car seat. Efren cued up Adele on his phone, put in your hand right by your chest, and to my utter surprise, you snuggled up to that smooth deep voice and drifted off to sleep.

When I started to get that familiar itch to create work, and wanted to see if it was possible to have rehearsal with you as choreographer's assistant, Efren was my first dancer guinea pig. We all congregated in the kitchen for our first rehearsal, mixing dancing to Harry Chapin with eating raspberries and showing you how do a proper IMS crawl. (cause we all know what they say about those kids who skip crawling) After we worked until we could work no more, we piled in the car (limo as some call it) and got some donuts.

I don't know how productive the rehearsal was, to be honest you are pretty high maintenance for an assistant, but Efren kept reassuring me that he had nowhere else to be, and that rehearsal could last for an indefinite amount of time. This was reassuring, as a first time Mom I am still clinging to the idea of me as being able to do everything I used to be able to do, and as someone who also just got an MFA in modern dance, I knew exactly where he was coming from with having nothing to do, or nowhere to be.

So Zachary, this is a little story of one of your friends who is good to you. When you and Efren first met he did this really excited enthusiastic animated face that freaked you out to the point of tears. Now a days there aren't any tears when you see each other, which I think is a combination of you getting used his enthusiastic faces and Efren toning it all down a notch.

It is the give and take, the change and acceptance that all good friendships are made of.

sleeping baby